1 00:00:14,950 --> 00:00:16,450 Attention, everyone, mail call! 2 00:00:16,460 --> 00:00:18,907 Meg, Teen People. Chris, Amazing Spiderman. 3 00:00:18,917 --> 00:00:19,942 Lois, Redbook. 4 00:00:19,952 --> 00:00:22,346 World War II Army Guy, a letter from your gal. 5 00:00:22,934 --> 00:00:25,468 (Laughter, catcalls) Open that one up, buddy. 6 00:00:25,540 --> 00:00:27,308 All right, at ease, at ease. 7 00:00:27,375 --> 00:00:28,642 "Dear Willy, it's been awful lonesome 8 00:00:28,710 --> 00:00:30,277 since you've been away." 9 00:00:30,345 --> 00:00:31,612 Hey, you hear that, fellas? She misses me! 10 00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,281 (Good-natured ribbing) Stewie: You're all wet. 11 00:00:35,684 --> 00:00:36,750 Hey, check this out. 12 00:00:36,818 --> 00:00:38,585 We got invited to a party. 13 00:00:38,653 --> 00:00:41,956 "Peter Griffin, you and your family are cordially invited 14 00:00:42,023 --> 00:00:45,025 to a gala dinner in your honor at Rocky Point Manor." 15 00:00:45,093 --> 00:00:47,061 What? What are they honoring you for? 16 00:00:47,128 --> 00:00:49,063 Who cares? It says here it's for the whole weekend. 17 00:00:49,130 --> 00:00:50,230 And it's free. 18 00:00:50,298 --> 00:00:51,632 Well, who's the invitation from? 19 00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:53,000 I don't know, it doesn't say. 20 00:00:53,068 --> 00:00:54,335 Wait, you're not gonna go, are you? 21 00:00:54,402 --> 00:00:55,836 It's clearly some kind of scam. 22 00:00:55,904 --> 00:00:58,172 Oh, well, then maybe we just go, and you go to the kennel. 23 00:00:58,239 --> 00:00:59,640 Oh, not the kennel. 24 00:00:59,708 --> 00:01:01,709 Last time you left me there for an hour. 25 00:01:01,776 --> 00:01:03,777 Or ten years, I don't know... There's no clock there! 26 00:01:03,845 --> 00:01:05,446 You stink when you come out of there. 27 00:01:06,948 --> 00:01:08,682 (Engine starts) 28 00:01:15,690 --> 00:01:19,660 Family Guy 9x01 And Then There Were Fewer Original Air Date on September 26, 2010 29 00:01:19,728 --> 00:01:24,352 -- Sync, corrected by elderman -- -- for www.addic7ed.com -- 30 00:02:57,459 --> 00:02:59,693 Dad, are we almost there? 31 00:02:59,761 --> 00:03:01,462 Yeah. According to the map, we're pretty close. 32 00:03:03,665 --> 00:03:06,200 (Gasps) Peter, look! 33 00:03:51,846 --> 00:03:53,680 (Waves crashing) 34 00:04:00,321 --> 00:04:04,525 My God, this is absolutely beautiful. 35 00:04:04,592 --> 00:04:07,361 I bet Jeff Probst has a house like this. 36 00:04:10,465 --> 00:04:12,499 - Joe? - Peter? 37 00:04:12,567 --> 00:04:14,134 What the hell are you guys doing here? 38 00:04:14,202 --> 00:04:17,171 Well, we got an invitation to a dinner in my honor. 39 00:04:17,238 --> 00:04:20,240 I assumed it was for all those arrests I made last month. 40 00:04:20,308 --> 00:04:22,743 That's weird. My invitation said it was in my honor. 41 00:04:22,810 --> 00:04:24,978 I assumed it was for being able to fart the alphabet, 42 00:04:25,046 --> 00:04:27,314 which I almost did till I pooped on the "S." 43 00:04:27,382 --> 00:04:29,216 Oh, well. Everybody on the bus was upset 44 00:04:29,284 --> 00:04:30,684 long before that anyway. 45 00:04:32,687 --> 00:04:33,487 What the... 46 00:04:36,558 --> 00:04:37,958 Derek and Jillian? 47 00:04:38,026 --> 00:04:39,860 Wow! Hi, Brian! 48 00:04:39,928 --> 00:04:40,994 Hey, kiddo. 49 00:04:41,062 --> 00:04:42,462 What... What are you guys doing here? 50 00:04:42,530 --> 00:04:44,831 I got a card that says they're throwing a dinner 51 00:04:44,899 --> 00:04:46,400 in my "honer." 52 00:04:46,467 --> 00:04:47,668 Wait a minute, what the hell's going on here? 53 00:04:47,735 --> 00:04:49,403 Everybody got the same invitation? 54 00:04:49,470 --> 00:04:52,739 Muriel, if you're not gonna eat your half of the cheeseburger, 55 00:04:52,807 --> 00:04:55,275 I'll see if they have a freezer, so I can keep it nice. 56 00:04:55,343 --> 00:04:58,145 I'm gonna walk around. I think my vagina's asleep. 57 00:05:05,019 --> 00:05:08,589 Oh. Hey. Uh... 58 00:05:08,656 --> 00:05:10,524 Didn't think I'd see anyone I knew here. 59 00:05:10,592 --> 00:05:13,060 This, uh, this is Stephanie. 60 00:05:13,127 --> 00:05:15,229 Hi, everybody! Oh, my gosh! 61 00:05:15,296 --> 00:05:17,898 I never thought I'd meet Glenn's friends! 62 00:05:17,966 --> 00:05:19,733 Yeah, I figured, why not? 63 00:05:19,801 --> 00:05:22,703 You know, you... we... You and I see each other from time to time. 64 00:05:22,770 --> 00:05:26,740 Oh, my God, we, like, never see each other! This guy! 65 00:05:26,808 --> 00:05:29,243 You, like, disappear for a month, and then you call me?! 66 00:05:29,310 --> 00:05:30,444 So silly! 67 00:05:30,511 --> 00:05:33,447 You're lucky I like you so much. 68 00:05:33,514 --> 00:05:36,149 Okay, why don't you go ahead and take the bags in. 69 00:05:36,217 --> 00:05:39,152 Wow, it... It looks like the whole town got invited. 70 00:05:47,695 --> 00:05:49,396 (Ice cream truck music plays) 71 00:06:12,186 --> 00:06:14,021 (With thick accent): Mr. Peter. 72 00:06:14,088 --> 00:06:15,689 Mr. Joe. 73 00:06:15,757 --> 00:06:17,024 Mr. Bonnie. 74 00:06:17,091 --> 00:06:18,992 She doesn't know what "Mr." means. 75 00:06:19,060 --> 00:06:20,494 Mr. Mort. 76 00:06:20,561 --> 00:06:22,429 Mr. Muriel. 77 00:06:22,497 --> 00:06:24,064 Mayor West Mr. 78 00:06:24,132 --> 00:06:25,766 Oh, my God, seriously. 79 00:06:25,833 --> 00:06:28,869 If you will all please follow me to third floor, 80 00:06:28,936 --> 00:06:30,837 I show you to your rooms. 81 00:06:30,905 --> 00:06:34,107 You are all expected for dinner at 8:00. 82 00:06:34,175 --> 00:06:35,609 Stephanie: Oh, good! I'm starved! 83 00:06:35,677 --> 00:06:37,411 Quagmire: Settle down, will ya? 84 00:06:57,865 --> 00:06:59,399 None of this makes any sense. 85 00:06:59,467 --> 00:07:02,336 Everyone got invitations from an anonymous source 86 00:07:02,403 --> 00:07:03,770 for a dinner in their honor, 87 00:07:03,838 --> 00:07:05,272 when that's clearly not the case. 88 00:07:05,340 --> 00:07:07,186 Now we're here, where the hell's our host? 89 00:07:07,196 --> 00:07:09,716 Well, at least you all had eveningwear provided for you. 90 00:07:09,810 --> 00:07:11,511 I thought this was going to be a lawn party. 91 00:07:11,579 --> 00:07:13,813 I don't have one pair of long pants. 92 00:07:13,881 --> 00:07:16,850 Boy, it's kinda awkward seeing Jillian here with Derek. 93 00:07:16,917 --> 00:07:18,117 I wonder if she's thinking about me. 94 00:07:18,185 --> 00:07:20,420 I don't know, are you a pony or the color blue? 95 00:07:20,488 --> 00:07:22,422 (Laughs) 96 00:07:22,490 --> 00:07:23,756 Derek, look! 97 00:07:23,824 --> 00:07:25,525 Ha, how do you like that? 98 00:07:25,593 --> 00:07:28,394 Have you guys ever seen Jim Henson's Labyrinth? 99 00:07:28,462 --> 00:07:30,096 No. Have you ever seen the Channel Five News? 100 00:07:30,164 --> 00:07:31,631 No. 101 00:07:31,699 --> 00:07:33,933 Uh, Labyrinth has teenage Jennifer Connelly. 102 00:07:34,001 --> 00:07:37,136 Channel Five News has file footage of pills being sorted. 103 00:07:37,204 --> 00:07:39,472 Some people think Jennifer Connelly's old now, 104 00:07:39,540 --> 00:07:41,841 and that her hands look like two bags of snakes. 105 00:07:41,909 --> 00:07:43,009 I think that's bogus. 106 00:07:43,077 --> 00:07:44,611 I don't think we have much in common. 107 00:07:44,678 --> 00:07:47,380 Good heavens, Meg, you're sprouting up like a weed! 108 00:07:47,448 --> 00:07:49,249 I know, she's growing every day. 109 00:07:49,316 --> 00:07:51,150 Meg, you remember Dr. Hartman. 110 00:07:51,218 --> 00:07:54,354 Of course she does! I performed her very first pelvic exam! 111 00:07:54,421 --> 00:07:57,624 Unless I'm confusing you with someone else. 112 00:07:57,691 --> 00:08:00,193 Nope. That was... That was you. 113 00:08:00,261 --> 00:08:02,328 (Footsteps descending staircase) 114 00:08:10,971 --> 00:08:12,372 Good evening, everyone. 115 00:08:12,439 --> 00:08:14,741 (Gasps) James Woods! 116 00:08:14,808 --> 00:08:16,342 (Growls) 117 00:08:16,410 --> 00:08:18,845 Thank you for joining me at my humble manor. 118 00:08:18,913 --> 00:08:22,181 I'd like to introduce you to my lovely companion, Pricilla. 119 00:08:22,249 --> 00:08:23,349 Nice to meet you all. 120 00:08:23,417 --> 00:08:24,551 Who's he? 121 00:08:24,618 --> 00:08:25,685 James Woods. 122 00:08:25,753 --> 00:08:27,487 Oh, I thought he was a shark. 123 00:08:27,555 --> 00:08:29,322 No, he was a on a show called Shark. 124 00:08:29,390 --> 00:08:30,990 But he's made of wood? 125 00:08:31,058 --> 00:08:33,760 No, his last name is Woods, but he's not made of wood. 126 00:08:33,827 --> 00:08:34,661 Nobody is. 127 00:08:36,397 --> 00:08:41,167 This truly is a night to celebrate, especially for me. 128 00:08:41,235 --> 00:08:42,869 Hey, what's going on here, Woods? 129 00:08:42,937 --> 00:08:45,171 The invitation said this was a dinner in my honor. 130 00:08:45,239 --> 00:08:46,539 That's what mine said, too. 131 00:08:46,607 --> 00:08:48,374 - Yeah, me, too! - Mine, too. - Same here! 132 00:08:48,442 --> 00:08:49,709 Stephanie: Where's the food? 133 00:08:49,777 --> 00:08:52,245 Well, actually, this dinner honors all of you. 134 00:08:52,313 --> 00:08:53,947 Where should I begin? 135 00:08:54,014 --> 00:08:57,383 You see, recently I've become a born-again Christian. 136 00:08:57,451 --> 00:09:00,653 Thanks to this beautiful little angel. 137 00:09:00,721 --> 00:09:03,089 She came into my life as if out of nowhere, 138 00:09:03,157 --> 00:09:05,592 enchanted me beyond my wildest dreams, 139 00:09:05,659 --> 00:09:08,361 and opened my eyes to the cleansing truth 140 00:09:08,429 --> 00:09:10,330 of Jesus Christ's love. 141 00:09:10,397 --> 00:09:12,565 No, honey, it was always within you. 142 00:09:12,633 --> 00:09:13,933 I just helped you find it. 143 00:09:14,001 --> 00:09:17,170 Um... What does all this gay stuff have to do with us? 144 00:09:17,237 --> 00:09:19,572 Well, the fact of the matter is, I have wronged 145 00:09:19,640 --> 00:09:22,375 each and every one of you in some way. 146 00:09:22,443 --> 00:09:26,346 And, since I am a man of God now, I am truly repentant. 147 00:09:26,413 --> 00:09:29,148 Woods: So, I invited you all here to make amends. 148 00:09:29,216 --> 00:09:30,984 And why the hell should we trust you? 149 00:09:31,051 --> 00:09:33,286 Yeah, you've been terrorizing our family for years. 150 00:09:33,354 --> 00:09:36,723 I understand that there is some healing to do here tonight, 151 00:09:36,790 --> 00:09:38,958 and I am prepared to be patient. 152 00:09:39,026 --> 00:09:42,195 Please, won't you just give me a chance? 153 00:09:42,262 --> 00:09:44,697 And I promise you won't be disappointed. 154 00:09:44,765 --> 00:09:47,500 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll just go check on dinner. 155 00:09:47,534 --> 00:09:48,801 Oh, I'll help you, sweetheart. 156 00:09:52,606 --> 00:09:54,340 This is all very strange. 157 00:09:54,408 --> 00:09:56,242 I agree. Something's not right. 158 00:09:56,310 --> 00:09:58,878 I don't know, maybe we should give him a chance. 159 00:09:58,946 --> 00:10:00,713 Maybe he really is born again. 160 00:10:00,781 --> 00:10:02,115 Well, he could be. 161 00:10:02,182 --> 00:10:04,484 It all depends on what his astrological sign is. 162 00:10:04,551 --> 00:10:07,487 Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. 163 00:10:07,554 --> 00:10:09,322 I'm very intuitive with these things. 164 00:10:09,390 --> 00:10:12,759 Maybe if I sit in his chair, I can get a reading on his energy. 165 00:10:12,826 --> 00:10:15,728 I mean, if he's an Aquarius, a rebirth would not be unexpected. 166 00:10:15,796 --> 00:10:17,296 That's enough, Stephanie. 167 00:10:17,364 --> 00:10:19,232 Stephanie: You know, it's like when I did Glenn's star chart... 168 00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,737 (All gasp) 169 00:10:24,805 --> 00:10:28,975 Did the... Did the cork hit me? 170 00:10:29,043 --> 00:10:30,276 (All screaming) 171 00:10:32,112 --> 00:10:34,380 My God. She's dead. 172 00:10:34,448 --> 00:10:35,982 She's been shot! 173 00:10:36,050 --> 00:10:37,717 (All gasp) 174 00:10:37,785 --> 00:10:39,786 I can't help feeling this would be sadder 175 00:10:39,853 --> 00:10:41,421 if she wasn't heavy. 176 00:10:46,845 --> 00:10:48,879 Oh, my God. It was him! 177 00:10:48,947 --> 00:10:51,749 It was James Woods! He killed Stephanie! 178 00:10:51,816 --> 00:10:54,618 Jeez, I knew he was crazy, but I didn't think he was a murderer! 179 00:10:54,686 --> 00:10:57,121 Oh, he must've brought us here to kill us all! 180 00:10:57,188 --> 00:10:58,856 Run! Run for your lives! 181 00:11:01,576 --> 00:11:03,032 Quick! We got to get out of here! 182 00:11:07,065 --> 00:11:08,265 (Thunder cracks) 183 00:11:08,333 --> 00:11:10,134 Come on, get in the car! 184 00:11:17,742 --> 00:11:19,543 (Thunder rumbling) 185 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:23,013 (Yelling) 186 00:11:23,081 --> 00:11:24,815 (Brakes screeching) 187 00:11:28,553 --> 00:11:29,887 Oh, my God, Peter, back it up! 188 00:11:29,954 --> 00:11:31,155 Oh, really, Lois? 189 00:11:31,222 --> 00:11:32,556 I thought I might drive forward. 190 00:11:32,624 --> 00:11:34,358 I thought that... that might be a fun thing to do. 191 00:11:34,425 --> 00:11:35,559 Stop fighting! 192 00:11:35,627 --> 00:11:36,927 (Metal creaking) 193 00:11:39,980 --> 00:11:42,493 Oh, my God! Quick, Peter, get in the back! 194 00:11:45,970 --> 00:11:47,371 (Engine revving, tires squealing) 195 00:11:47,438 --> 00:11:49,039 (Loud thudding) 196 00:11:53,028 --> 00:11:54,901 Oh, thank God. We made it. 197 00:11:54,913 --> 00:11:56,510 Oh! Aah! 198 00:11:56,533 --> 00:11:58,142 Ow! My neck! 199 00:11:58,165 --> 00:12:00,690 You backed into me, and... and now... Oh! 200 00:12:00,702 --> 00:12:01,747 Muriel: And your back! 201 00:12:01,759 --> 00:12:04,577 And my back! My back, yes! Oh! 202 00:12:04,697 --> 00:12:07,457 (Thunder rumbling) 203 00:12:09,205 --> 00:12:11,373 All right, it looks like we're stuck here. 204 00:12:11,441 --> 00:12:14,243 Storm has flooded the causeway, and the bridge is destroyed. 205 00:12:14,310 --> 00:12:16,712 For the moment, there's no way out. 206 00:12:16,780 --> 00:12:18,013 No Way Out. Great film. 207 00:12:18,081 --> 00:12:19,648 Sean Young naked in the limo? 208 00:12:19,716 --> 00:12:20,849 What are we gonna do? 209 00:12:20,917 --> 00:12:22,184 We can't just stay here 210 00:12:22,252 --> 00:12:24,119 with James Woods lurking somewhere in the house! 211 00:12:24,187 --> 00:12:25,921 All right, does anyone have a cell phone? 212 00:12:27,490 --> 00:12:28,991 I'm not getting any reception! 213 00:12:29,058 --> 00:12:30,526 - Me neither! - No bars! 214 00:12:30,593 --> 00:12:31,894 It's all right. 215 00:12:31,961 --> 00:12:33,695 I'll put a message in a bottle. 216 00:12:37,300 --> 00:12:39,568 Now... we wait. 217 00:12:39,636 --> 00:12:41,670 Look, he's got a land line we can use! 218 00:12:41,738 --> 00:12:44,306 Oh, no. You know, I wouldn't feel right about that. 219 00:12:44,374 --> 00:12:46,275 We're guests, and it's long distance. 220 00:12:46,342 --> 00:12:47,509 Doesn't matter. 221 00:12:47,577 --> 00:12:48,911 The line's dead. 222 00:12:48,978 --> 00:12:50,846 (Panicked, overlapping chatter) 223 00:12:52,115 --> 00:12:53,415 Whoa, whoa, whoa, all right. 224 00:12:53,483 --> 00:12:55,717 Look, everybody but Chris, just keep your pants on 225 00:12:55,785 --> 00:12:57,820 and let's figure a way out of this. 226 00:12:57,887 --> 00:12:59,855 He's right. We just got to stay calm. 227 00:12:59,923 --> 00:13:01,356 With a killer in the house?! 228 00:13:01,424 --> 00:13:02,891 Killer in the house...! 229 00:13:02,959 --> 00:13:05,027 Hey, guys, has anybody seen James? 230 00:13:05,094 --> 00:13:07,329 Sweetheart, you may want to sit down for this. 231 00:13:07,397 --> 00:13:09,698 Who want little tiny tacos? 232 00:13:09,766 --> 00:13:12,267 Ooh, little taco. I'll have one of those. 233 00:13:12,335 --> 00:13:13,602 (All gasping) It's him! 234 00:13:13,670 --> 00:13:14,837 Sorry I took so long. 235 00:13:14,904 --> 00:13:16,405 I was going to the bathroom, 236 00:13:16,473 --> 00:13:18,574 and I just couldn't stop looking at my penis, 237 00:13:18,641 --> 00:13:20,008 'cause it's, you know, so fantastic. 238 00:13:20,076 --> 00:13:21,777 You're a monster... Yeah, I heard it's fantastic. 239 00:13:21,845 --> 00:13:23,245 You're a monster, James Woods! 240 00:13:23,313 --> 00:13:25,781 You think you can just commit murder and get away with it?! 241 00:13:25,849 --> 00:13:27,015 Quagmire loved that girl! 242 00:13:27,083 --> 00:13:28,116 Quagmire: Easy. 243 00:13:28,184 --> 00:13:29,418 Murder? 244 00:13:29,486 --> 00:13:30,686 Wha... What are you talking about? 245 00:13:30,753 --> 00:13:33,021 You're going away for a long time, pal. 246 00:13:33,089 --> 00:13:34,323 Jimmy, what does he mean? 247 00:13:34,390 --> 00:13:36,358 Look, I honestly don't know what's going on here. 248 00:13:36,426 --> 00:13:37,593 Oh, really? 249 00:13:37,660 --> 00:13:39,428 Well, maybe that dead pile of cookie dough 250 00:13:39,496 --> 00:13:41,196 in the next room will refresh your memory. 251 00:13:41,264 --> 00:13:42,431 What do you mean? 252 00:13:42,499 --> 00:13:44,800 There's nothing in the next room. 253 00:13:49,973 --> 00:13:51,707 (Gasps) It's gone! 254 00:13:51,774 --> 00:13:53,876 Where is she, Woods? What'd you do with the body? 255 00:13:53,943 --> 00:13:55,210 What body? 256 00:13:55,278 --> 00:13:56,812 You know, maybe she wasn't dead. 257 00:13:56,880 --> 00:13:59,348 I'll admit it, I'm... I'm not great with that stuff sometimes. 258 00:13:59,415 --> 00:14:01,316 All right, I don't know what's happening here, 259 00:14:01,384 --> 00:14:02,985 but look, I'm a lot of things. 260 00:14:03,052 --> 00:14:05,387 A member of Mensa, a huge hit with the ladies, 261 00:14:05,455 --> 00:14:07,523 someone who, you know, would have broken out bigger 262 00:14:07,590 --> 00:14:09,358 if he weren't so impossible to work with. 263 00:14:09,425 --> 00:14:10,592 Right. But a murderer? 264 00:14:10,660 --> 00:14:12,694 I only just found God. 265 00:14:12,762 --> 00:14:15,063 Why would I jeopardize my entrance into heaven? 266 00:14:15,131 --> 00:14:16,999 If I were you, I'd keep your mouth shut 267 00:14:17,066 --> 00:14:18,333 till you talk to a lawyer. 268 00:14:18,401 --> 00:14:20,335 I didn't kill anybody! 269 00:14:20,403 --> 00:14:21,527 (Thunder rumbling, electrical hiss) 270 00:14:21,539 --> 00:14:22,384 (All gasping) 271 00:14:22,396 --> 00:14:24,052 Peter: Oh my God. 272 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:26,588 Is this what black people see all the time? 273 00:14:26,609 --> 00:14:28,610 (Stabbing, grunt, thud) 274 00:14:28,678 --> 00:14:30,312 (People screaming) 275 00:14:30,380 --> 00:14:31,613 (Electrical hiss) 276 00:14:31,681 --> 00:14:33,170 (Gasps) Look! 277 00:14:33,193 --> 00:14:35,551 (Screaming) 278 00:14:38,214 --> 00:14:39,154 He's dead. 279 00:14:39,222 --> 00:14:40,556 Oh, my God! 280 00:14:40,623 --> 00:14:41,823 Nice. 281 00:14:41,891 --> 00:14:43,258 Nobody touch the knife! 282 00:14:43,326 --> 00:14:45,127 There could be fingerprints on it. 283 00:14:45,194 --> 00:14:47,429 So James Woods murdered Stephanie, 284 00:14:47,497 --> 00:14:48,864 and then he murdered himself. 285 00:14:48,932 --> 00:14:50,165 Criss-cross. 286 00:14:50,233 --> 00:14:51,633 No, Peter. Don't you see? 287 00:14:51,701 --> 00:14:54,169 He didn't kill himself, and he didn't kill Stephanie. 288 00:14:54,237 --> 00:14:55,571 What are you saying? 289 00:14:55,638 --> 00:14:58,373 I'm saying, James Woods isn't the murderer. 290 00:14:58,441 --> 00:15:00,342 The murderer... 291 00:15:00,410 --> 00:15:02,177 is one of us! 292 00:15:02,245 --> 00:15:03,612 (All gasping) 293 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:06,815 And someone ate the last goat cheese tartlet. 294 00:15:06,883 --> 00:15:08,450 (All expressing outrage) 295 00:15:08,518 --> 00:15:10,252 Now I hope I die next. 296 00:15:12,997 --> 00:15:15,198 (Thunder cracks) 297 00:15:18,803 --> 00:15:19,570 Okay, everyone, 298 00:15:19,617 --> 00:15:21,518 it's important that we all stay calm. 299 00:15:21,586 --> 00:15:23,253 How are we supposed to stay calm?! 300 00:15:23,321 --> 00:15:24,588 There's a killer in the room! 301 00:15:24,655 --> 00:15:26,289 We all got to get out of here! 302 00:15:26,357 --> 00:15:27,390 We're all gonna die! 303 00:15:27,458 --> 00:15:29,359 Mr. Mayor, pull yourself together! 304 00:15:29,427 --> 00:15:30,627 (China breaking) 305 00:15:30,695 --> 00:15:32,829 Wait a minute. Joe, look! 306 00:15:43,508 --> 00:15:44,875 Oh, my God. 307 00:15:44,942 --> 00:15:46,710 Stephanie was an accident. 308 00:15:46,777 --> 00:15:48,111 That's a way of putting it. 309 00:15:48,179 --> 00:15:49,479 What do you mean, Joe? 310 00:15:49,547 --> 00:15:52,015 This gun was timed to fire directly at that chair, 311 00:15:52,083 --> 00:15:53,650 where James Woods would have been sitting. 312 00:15:53,718 --> 00:15:54,985 But he left, 313 00:15:55,052 --> 00:15:56,887 and Stephanie was in the wrong place 314 00:15:56,954 --> 00:15:58,154 at the wrong time. 315 00:15:58,222 --> 00:15:59,689 So whoever the murderer is, 316 00:15:59,757 --> 00:16:02,526 they were after James Woods, not Stephanie. 317 00:16:02,593 --> 00:16:04,461 The question is, 318 00:16:04,529 --> 00:16:06,997 who here wanted James Woods dead? 319 00:16:13,337 --> 00:16:16,106 Let's look around and see if we can find any more clues. 320 00:16:24,835 --> 00:16:27,537 Oh, my God. 321 00:16:29,136 --> 00:16:30,496 Brian, I feel like everyone's wondering 322 00:16:30,563 --> 00:16:31,764 why I'm wearing shorts. 323 00:16:31,831 --> 00:16:33,093 Nobody's even looking at you. 324 00:16:33,105 --> 00:16:33,832 That's what I mean. 325 00:16:33,843 --> 00:16:35,605 The fact that no one has said anything 326 00:16:35,616 --> 00:16:37,798 makes it even more obvious that everyone has noticed. 327 00:16:37,822 --> 00:16:39,243 Peter: Brian, look what I found! 328 00:16:39,254 --> 00:16:40,264 Check it out! 329 00:16:40,288 --> 00:16:42,342 I'm a robot from outer space! 330 00:16:42,390 --> 00:16:43,524 Hang on. I'm coming down. 331 00:16:43,592 --> 00:16:45,759 Go, go, gadget skis! 332 00:16:45,827 --> 00:16:47,661 (Metal clanking) 333 00:16:49,257 --> 00:16:50,698 (China breaking, Joe groans) 334 00:16:51,123 --> 00:16:52,299 Uh-oh. 335 00:16:52,885 --> 00:16:55,469 All right, since it's my fault that Joe got knocked out, 336 00:16:55,537 --> 00:16:58,739 it is now my responsibility to take over the investigation. 337 00:16:58,807 --> 00:17:00,507 I... I don't know if that actually follows. 338 00:17:00,575 --> 00:17:01,942 Oh, it does follow, Brian. 339 00:17:02,010 --> 00:17:05,045 Because I'm the one with the giant magnifying glass. 340 00:17:05,113 --> 00:17:06,714 - Is my eye big? - Yeah. 341 00:17:06,781 --> 00:17:09,717 Good. Good. That means progress. 342 00:17:09,784 --> 00:17:11,552 All right, let's... Let's figure out what we know here. 343 00:17:11,620 --> 00:17:13,821 The gun was clearly meant to kill James Woods, 344 00:17:13,888 --> 00:17:15,689 but Stephanie got in the way. 345 00:17:15,757 --> 00:17:17,458 So the murderer had to improvise 346 00:17:17,525 --> 00:17:19,393 and finish the job by stabbing him. 347 00:17:19,461 --> 00:17:22,296 Now who here had a motive for wanting James Woods dead? 348 00:17:22,364 --> 00:17:24,565 Well, according to James Woods, we all did. 349 00:17:24,633 --> 00:17:26,967 He brought us here to make amends with us. 350 00:17:27,035 --> 00:17:29,703 But he wronged one of us enough to want revenge. 351 00:17:29,771 --> 00:17:31,972 The question is, who? 352 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,108 Well, I know one person who could have. 353 00:17:34,175 --> 00:17:36,010 My partner Tom. 354 00:17:36,077 --> 00:17:37,211 (All gasp) 355 00:17:37,278 --> 00:17:38,512 All right, it's true. 356 00:17:38,632 --> 00:17:40,661 James Woods ruined my career! 357 00:17:40,684 --> 00:17:42,410 I originally wanted to be an actor. 358 00:17:42,422 --> 00:17:44,665 And I booked the lead role in Nightmare on Elm Street. 359 00:17:44,688 --> 00:17:46,654 But James Woods said, "No, don't bother. 360 00:17:46,721 --> 00:17:48,088 Something else will come along." 361 00:17:48,156 --> 00:17:49,406 So I turned it down. 362 00:17:49,418 --> 00:17:52,072 And now this Robert Englund is the talk of the town. 363 00:17:52,083 --> 00:17:54,061 That should be me everyone's talking about! 364 00:17:54,129 --> 00:17:55,766 Was I angry? Yes, of course! 365 00:17:55,789 --> 00:17:56,697 But I didn't kill him! 366 00:17:57,146 --> 00:17:58,212 What about Seamus? 367 00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:00,360 You hated James Woods. You told me so! 368 00:18:00,372 --> 00:18:04,435 Aye. He's the one who made me what I am today. 369 00:18:04,669 --> 00:18:05,507 (Sighs) 370 00:18:05,519 --> 00:18:08,630 I wish you were a real, live ornery sea captain. 371 00:18:08,783 --> 00:18:10,150 But he didn't wish hard enough! 372 00:18:10,217 --> 00:18:11,651 It only worked on me head! 373 00:18:11,719 --> 00:18:12,819 Oh, my God, seriously? 374 00:18:12,887 --> 00:18:14,454 No. Actually, I was a normal guy 375 00:18:14,522 --> 00:18:16,089 until one night, we dropped acid together, 376 00:18:16,157 --> 00:18:17,724 and he thought I was a steak. 377 00:18:17,792 --> 00:18:19,359 Grilled me, ate me arms and legs. 378 00:18:19,427 --> 00:18:21,761 It was a whole thing. But I'm not the killer! 379 00:18:21,829 --> 00:18:22,925 What about the mayor? 380 00:18:22,949 --> 00:18:25,265 He could have killed him and got himself off scot-free! 381 00:18:25,332 --> 00:18:26,166 (Sighs) 382 00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:28,501 He took the Twitter name MayorWest, 383 00:18:28,569 --> 00:18:32,005 so now I have to use Mayor_West. 384 00:18:32,073 --> 00:18:34,107 That rat-faced cracker! 385 00:18:34,175 --> 00:18:36,342 But you hated him, too, Dr. Hartman. 386 00:18:36,410 --> 00:18:38,378 Sure, I hated him, but so did Mort. 387 00:18:38,446 --> 00:18:40,914 I didn't kill him! Maybe it was Diane. 388 00:18:40,981 --> 00:18:41,927 (Sighs) 389 00:18:41,950 --> 00:18:44,684 James Woods promised to introduce me to Dan Rather. 390 00:18:44,752 --> 00:18:47,220 But instead, he introduced me to Danny Bonaduce. 391 00:18:47,288 --> 00:18:50,123 I tell you, that guy looks like a dog turning thirty. 392 00:18:50,191 --> 00:18:51,891 But what about the old guy? 393 00:18:51,959 --> 00:18:54,494 I heard him complaining about Woods in the dining room. 394 00:18:54,562 --> 00:18:55,425 That's true. 395 00:18:55,448 --> 00:18:58,698 He replaced my Cialis with methamphetamines! 396 00:18:59,358 --> 00:19:02,218 - Pedal faster! - I can't go any faster! 397 00:19:02,235 --> 00:19:03,250 Where you going, kids? 398 00:19:03,251 --> 00:19:04,648 Hey, I just want to talk to you. 399 00:19:04,660 --> 00:19:05,717 Why don't you come over to my place 400 00:19:05,728 --> 00:19:07,238 for a glass of wine and a couple of fruit pies, 401 00:19:07,262 --> 00:19:08,213 and then we can go in the back room 402 00:19:08,213 --> 00:19:10,678 and play crazy snake. Hee-hee-hee! 403 00:19:10,821 --> 00:19:12,622 And what about Quagmire? 404 00:19:12,690 --> 00:19:15,058 Fine! So he stole Cheryl Tiegs from me! 405 00:19:15,126 --> 00:19:16,493 He ruined your TV pilot! 406 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:18,595 Go to hell! I backed out of that project willingly. 407 00:19:18,663 --> 00:19:19,896 Oh, yeah, that's what every hack says. 408 00:19:19,964 --> 00:19:21,064 - You know, Brian... - I'm telling you... 409 00:19:21,132 --> 00:19:24,034 (All yelling angrily at each other) 410 00:19:31,642 --> 00:19:33,076 (All stop yelling) 411 00:19:35,646 --> 00:19:37,480 (All gasp) 412 00:19:39,116 --> 00:19:40,884 Stewie: Eh. My secret room's bigger. 413 00:19:40,952 --> 00:19:42,719 Herbert: Mine's smaller. 414 00:19:44,922 --> 00:19:46,122 All right, stand back. 415 00:19:46,190 --> 00:19:48,024 This could be dangerous. 416 00:19:51,099 --> 00:19:53,930 Peter: Oh, laundry room. Laundry room, everybody. 417 00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:03,468 Oh, see, here we go. 418 00:20:32,267 --> 00:20:35,493 Aha! James Woods made a list of all his misdeeds 419 00:20:35,511 --> 00:20:36,812 so he could make amends. 420 00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:38,647 Bonnie, he punched you in the throat, 421 00:20:38,715 --> 00:20:40,019 and that's why you sound like that? 422 00:20:40,057 --> 00:20:43,821 No, he punched me in the throat because I sound like this. 423 00:20:43,941 --> 00:20:45,230 And Consuela, he... 424 00:20:45,350 --> 00:20:47,083 Actually, I can't read his handwriting here. 425 00:20:47,095 --> 00:20:48,031 What... What happened? 426 00:20:48,034 --> 00:20:50,367 One day, I bring my nephew to work, 427 00:20:50,434 --> 00:20:54,668 and he molest my nephew, and my nephew... He only fourteen, 428 00:20:54,680 --> 00:20:58,542 and he cry, and then, he shoot himself in the face. 429 00:20:59,182 --> 00:21:00,644 What are all these? 430 00:21:00,955 --> 00:21:03,480 God, there are tons of OxyContin bottles in here. 431 00:21:03,885 --> 00:21:05,916 All prescribed to James Woods. 432 00:21:06,175 --> 00:21:07,984 And all from Goldman's Pharmacy. 433 00:21:08,052 --> 00:21:09,519 What's that all about, Goldman? 434 00:21:09,587 --> 00:21:11,388 I don't know what you're talking about. 435 00:21:11,455 --> 00:21:14,491 James Woods never bought anything in my pharmacy. Ever. 436 00:21:14,559 --> 00:21:15,992 Peter: Yes, he did. 437 00:21:16,060 --> 00:21:18,728 Says here he talked Muriel into selling him OxyContin 438 00:21:18,796 --> 00:21:20,463 for him and his nineteen-year-old girlfriend. 439 00:21:20,531 --> 00:21:21,898 This went on for weeks, 440 00:21:21,966 --> 00:21:23,600 but then she started to have misgivings 441 00:21:23,668 --> 00:21:24,970 and threatened to cut him off. 442 00:21:24,993 --> 00:21:26,520 But he wouldn't let her. 443 00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:29,739 He threatened to blackmail her by turning her in to the Feds. 444 00:21:29,807 --> 00:21:31,775 Sounds like a pretty good motive to me. 445 00:21:31,843 --> 00:21:33,476 No! No, it's not true! 446 00:21:33,544 --> 00:21:35,245 I would never kill anybody, never! 447 00:21:35,313 --> 00:21:37,214 And I am not saying another word 448 00:21:37,281 --> 00:21:39,015 until I talk to my lawyer, because... 449 00:21:39,083 --> 00:21:40,417 Why is he wearing shorts? 450 00:21:40,484 --> 00:21:42,319 Oh, my God, I told you! 451 00:21:42,386 --> 00:21:44,521 Muriel, just surrender quietly. 452 00:21:44,589 --> 00:21:46,723 It'll be easier for us all if you... 453 00:21:46,791 --> 00:21:48,425 (Thunder cracking, electrical hiss) 454 00:21:48,492 --> 00:21:50,126 (Meg screams) 455 00:21:50,194 --> 00:21:51,228 (Brief electrical hiss) 456 00:21:51,295 --> 00:21:52,796 (Gasps) She's gone! 457 00:22:01,339 --> 00:22:02,439 We lost her. 458 00:22:02,506 --> 00:22:04,474 Well, as long as there's a murderer on the loose, 459 00:22:04,542 --> 00:22:05,909 none of us are safe. 460 00:22:05,977 --> 00:22:07,777 All right, let's split up and search the house. 461 00:22:07,845 --> 00:22:09,145 I'll go with Lois. 462 00:22:09,213 --> 00:22:10,947 Chris, you check the basement with Herbert. 463 00:22:11,015 --> 00:22:12,115 (Spring bounces) 464 00:22:12,183 --> 00:22:13,683 Meg, you go with Brian and Stewie. 465 00:22:13,751 --> 00:22:15,452 Uh, no, she... She can't. 466 00:22:15,519 --> 00:22:16,653 Yeah, uh, she can't. 467 00:22:16,721 --> 00:22:19,256 We... we... we were gonna use this time, uh... 468 00:22:19,323 --> 00:22:21,558 to figure out what to get you for your birthday. 469 00:22:21,626 --> 00:22:23,326 Ooh, ah, okay. Oh, yeah, no, you guys go. 470 00:22:23,394 --> 00:22:24,527 You guys... Ooh, now I'm excited. 471 00:22:24,595 --> 00:22:25,829 Um, okay, um, Meg, 472 00:22:25,897 --> 00:22:27,564 you go with Carl. Sorry, Carl. 473 00:22:27,632 --> 00:22:28,832 Tom and Diane, you're a team. 474 00:22:28,900 --> 00:22:30,567 Quagmire and Bonnie, you're a team. 475 00:22:30,635 --> 00:22:33,503 Um... Seamus and Dr. Hartman? That... That could be funny. 476 00:22:33,571 --> 00:22:35,305 Don't usually see the two of you together. 477 00:22:35,373 --> 00:22:37,407 Uh, Derek and Jillian, you guys take the attic. 478 00:22:37,475 --> 00:22:39,209 Joe and Priscilla are still passed out, 479 00:22:39,277 --> 00:22:40,644 so they'll be the unconscious team. 480 00:22:40,711 --> 00:22:43,480 And that leaves one three-person team 481 00:22:43,547 --> 00:22:45,749 of Mort, Consuela, and Mayor West. 482 00:22:45,816 --> 00:22:47,951 All right. Let's do this. 483 00:22:50,788 --> 00:22:53,123 So, uh... 484 00:22:53,190 --> 00:22:54,591 You guys like to party? 485 00:22:54,659 --> 00:22:55,759 (Gasps) No! 486 00:22:55,826 --> 00:22:57,460 Oh, no. 487 00:22:57,528 --> 00:22:59,896 Oh, my God, what a couple of squares. 488 00:22:59,964 --> 00:23:01,464 Squaresville, I tell ya! 489 00:23:05,414 --> 00:23:07,715 (Thunder rumbling) 490 00:23:17,527 --> 00:23:18,994 What are we supposed to be doing again? 491 00:23:19,062 --> 00:23:20,929 We're looking for Muriel Goldman, honey. 492 00:23:20,997 --> 00:23:22,064 (Creaks) 493 00:23:31,230 --> 00:23:32,707 Hello? 494 00:23:33,402 --> 00:23:34,846 Is anybody up here? 495 00:23:46,476 --> 00:23:47,943 (Screeches) 496 00:23:48,753 --> 00:23:51,959 Hey, maybe it was that cat who was the murderer. 497 00:23:52,095 --> 00:23:53,262 Let me ask him. 498 00:23:53,329 --> 00:23:56,064 Meow, meow, meow? Meow-meow-meow-meow? 499 00:23:56,132 --> 00:23:58,200 We don't all talk like that. 500 00:23:58,268 --> 00:23:59,801 I happen to be a professor. 501 00:23:59,869 --> 00:24:01,270 Our apologies, sir. 502 00:24:01,337 --> 00:24:03,005 I should imagine so. 503 00:24:03,072 --> 00:24:05,240 Now if you'll excuse me, I have papers to correct. 504 00:24:10,313 --> 00:24:13,488 Chris, I'm worried, with this killer on the loose. 505 00:24:13,608 --> 00:24:17,010 If I should die, I... I just want you to know 506 00:24:17,130 --> 00:24:19,218 that they might find some things. 507 00:24:19,338 --> 00:24:20,684 Strange things. 508 00:24:20,696 --> 00:24:22,880 Things that don't make sense to you. 509 00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,559 Um... okay. 510 00:24:24,627 --> 00:24:26,261 And there's gonna be a lot of talk. 511 00:24:26,329 --> 00:24:27,729 Nasty talk. 512 00:24:27,797 --> 00:24:30,265 And I just want you to know, from me, 513 00:24:30,333 --> 00:24:32,901 it's all gonna be out of context. 514 00:24:32,969 --> 00:24:34,770 I don't know what that means. 515 00:24:34,837 --> 00:24:38,006 It means, if I die, you got to burn my house down! 516 00:24:44,551 --> 00:24:46,081 (Echoing): Muriel? 517 00:24:46,149 --> 00:24:48,283 Oh, yeah, like she's going to answer you, Tom. 518 00:24:48,351 --> 00:24:50,285 And here we go with the attitude. 519 00:24:50,353 --> 00:24:51,553 This is why you're single. 520 00:24:51,621 --> 00:24:53,322 Oh, so I'm not supposed to point out 521 00:24:53,389 --> 00:24:54,656 when you do something stupid? 522 00:24:54,724 --> 00:24:56,591 You hear that? You hear that tone you're using? 523 00:24:56,659 --> 00:24:58,160 That's penis repellent right there. 524 00:25:04,691 --> 00:25:07,897 Careful. She could be hiding behind any one of these statues. 525 00:25:08,930 --> 00:25:12,441 Muriel, this is Tom Tucker from the Channel Five News. 526 00:25:12,508 --> 00:25:13,975 Perhaps you'd like an autograph. 527 00:25:14,043 --> 00:25:16,085 Oh, for God's sakes. Do you hear yourself? 528 00:25:16,108 --> 00:25:18,083 There it is. (Mimes spraying repellent) 529 00:25:18,365 --> 00:25:19,645 Knock it off! 530 00:25:19,669 --> 00:25:20,682 (Thud) 531 00:25:21,336 --> 00:25:22,117 Hey, wait a minute. 532 00:25:22,185 --> 00:25:23,952 Doesn't feel like there's any wall here. 533 00:25:33,001 --> 00:25:34,496 What do you think's in there? 534 00:25:34,564 --> 00:25:36,365 I don't know. Looks scary. 535 00:25:36,432 --> 00:25:38,166 What do you think, Ollie? 536 00:25:38,579 --> 00:25:39,706 I miss Ollie. 537 00:25:39,730 --> 00:25:41,679 (Sighs) I better take a look. 538 00:25:41,702 --> 00:25:43,640 No. I'll go first. 539 00:25:45,847 --> 00:25:47,309 Do you see anything? 540 00:25:47,377 --> 00:25:49,778 No, it's... It's too dark. 541 00:25:52,148 --> 00:25:54,783 Tom? Tom! 542 00:25:57,762 --> 00:25:59,454 Oh, sweet. A pool table. 543 00:25:59,522 --> 00:26:01,323 Let's see if we can find some cues. 544 00:26:09,098 --> 00:26:10,866 (Thunder crashes, Carl screams) 545 00:26:10,933 --> 00:26:11,967 (Gasps) What is it?! 546 00:26:12,034 --> 00:26:14,169 Whew. It's okay. 547 00:26:14,237 --> 00:26:16,538 It's just the stuffed bear from The Great Outdoors. 548 00:26:16,606 --> 00:26:18,073 Did you see The Great Outdoors? 549 00:26:18,141 --> 00:26:19,574 - No. - You suck. 550 00:26:20,153 --> 00:26:21,750 Hey, I found the pool cues! 551 00:26:24,614 --> 00:26:26,448 (Screams) 552 00:26:28,284 --> 00:26:29,184 Meg? 553 00:26:31,154 --> 00:26:32,754 Looks like I'm all alone. 554 00:26:32,822 --> 00:26:34,256 Well, hey, that's all right. 555 00:26:34,323 --> 00:26:35,357 I watch a lot of movies. 556 00:26:35,425 --> 00:26:37,626 I can just use my imagination. 557 00:26:38,157 --> 00:26:40,095 - Hi, Carl. - Hey, bear. 558 00:26:40,163 --> 00:26:41,763 So, um, in the bear world, 559 00:26:41,831 --> 00:26:44,900 are, like, pandas your version of interracial children? 560 00:26:44,967 --> 00:26:47,402 Yeah. Pandas aren't something I agree with. 561 00:26:47,470 --> 00:26:48,537 They're cute, though, right? 562 00:26:48,604 --> 00:26:50,305 Just when they're babies. 563 00:26:50,373 --> 00:26:53,208 (Thunder crashes, rain pours) 564 00:27:00,651 --> 00:27:02,031 (Thunder rumbles) 565 00:27:02,151 --> 00:27:03,919 Boy, it's really raining hard. 566 00:27:03,986 --> 00:27:06,121 Yeah, well, we needed it. 567 00:27:06,189 --> 00:27:07,422 What? 568 00:27:07,490 --> 00:27:09,257 Peter, we've been married a long time. 569 00:27:09,325 --> 00:27:11,526 Why do I still get "guy in an elevator" small talk? 570 00:27:11,594 --> 00:27:13,795 I don't know. You're the one talking about the weather. 571 00:27:14,224 --> 00:27:15,197 So... 572 00:27:15,264 --> 00:27:17,999 Looking forward to the weekend? 573 00:27:24,140 --> 00:27:25,373 (Screams) 574 00:27:25,441 --> 00:27:26,808 It's okay. It's just us. 575 00:27:26,876 --> 00:27:29,578 Oh, Quagmire, Bonnie, you scared us. 576 00:27:29,645 --> 00:27:31,713 Have you seen any sign of Muriel? 577 00:27:31,781 --> 00:27:33,248 Oh, why didn't I think of this before? 578 00:27:33,316 --> 00:27:35,784 I should just check the "Find a Jew" app on my phone. 579 00:27:35,852 --> 00:27:38,987 Huh. There's just two big clusters 580 00:27:39,055 --> 00:27:40,922 on each side of the country. 581 00:27:40,990 --> 00:27:43,091 No, look. There's one down south. 582 00:27:43,159 --> 00:27:44,359 Ah, they got him. 583 00:27:44,427 --> 00:27:46,261 (Thunder rumbles) 584 00:27:52,735 --> 00:27:54,402 Okay, um... 585 00:27:54,470 --> 00:27:58,173 (Hums theme to Lost in Space) 586 00:27:58,241 --> 00:27:59,741 Oh, uh, Lost in Space. 587 00:27:59,809 --> 00:28:01,543 Yup, okay. Um... 588 00:28:01,611 --> 00:28:04,779 (Hums theme to Dick Van Dyke Show) 589 00:28:04,847 --> 00:28:06,214 Oh, uh, uh, that's Dick Van Dyke. 590 00:28:06,282 --> 00:28:07,415 Okay, um... 591 00:28:07,483 --> 00:28:09,117 Oh, okay, I... I... I got one, um... 592 00:28:09,185 --> 00:28:15,524 (Hums theme to Dynasty) 593 00:28:15,591 --> 00:28:16,758 I have no idea. 594 00:28:16,826 --> 00:28:19,895 ♪ Linda Evans and John Forsythe. ♪ 595 00:28:19,962 --> 00:28:22,664 ♪ They're coming down big, long stairs. ♪ 596 00:28:22,732 --> 00:28:25,166 ♪ Come on, Brian, you know this. ♪ 597 00:28:25,234 --> 00:28:26,635 ♪ We're all rich. ♪ 598 00:28:26,702 --> 00:28:31,273 ♪ And we're all at least in our late 50s. ♪ 599 00:28:31,340 --> 00:28:33,275 ♪ Think Joan Collins. ♪ 600 00:28:33,342 --> 00:28:34,943 (Humming trumpet part) 601 00:28:35,011 --> 00:28:36,011 ♪ Come on, Brian, you know this. ♪ 602 00:28:36,078 --> 00:28:37,345 (Humming trumpet part) 603 00:28:37,413 --> 00:28:38,246 ♪ It's the middle trumpet part. ♪ 604 00:28:38,314 --> 00:28:39,648 (Humming trumpet part) 605 00:28:39,715 --> 00:28:41,917 ♪ It was a pretty big deal for Diahann Carroll ♪ 606 00:28:41,984 --> 00:28:44,219 ♪ to play a rich, black woman in the 80s. ♪ 607 00:28:44,287 --> 00:28:45,954 Come on, Bri. Right? Y... You don't know this? 608 00:28:46,022 --> 00:28:47,422 Uh, Falcon Crest? 609 00:28:47,490 --> 00:28:49,190 Oh, it's "Dinasty"! 610 00:28:49,258 --> 00:28:51,226 Oh. Yeah, I... I didn't watch that. 611 00:28:51,294 --> 00:28:53,395 (Woman screams) 612 00:28:58,501 --> 00:29:00,001 (Thunder crashes) 613 00:29:00,069 --> 00:29:01,836 (Screaming) Oh, my God! 614 00:29:02,572 --> 00:29:03,876 (All gasp) 615 00:29:04,146 --> 00:29:05,320 (All gasp) 616 00:29:05,775 --> 00:29:07,842 Oh, my God, Muriel! 617 00:29:07,910 --> 00:29:09,477 My sweet Muriel! 618 00:29:09,545 --> 00:29:12,714 She was so young. She was so beauti... 619 00:29:12,782 --> 00:29:14,482 She was so genero... 620 00:29:14,550 --> 00:29:16,818 Uh, we were married. 621 00:29:16,886 --> 00:29:20,055 Look! This is the same knife that killed James Woods. 622 00:29:20,122 --> 00:29:21,456 Oh, my God! 623 00:29:21,524 --> 00:29:23,725 Then Muriel wasn't the killer. 624 00:29:23,793 --> 00:29:25,760 Well, then, who is? 625 00:29:25,828 --> 00:29:27,862 I don't know, but one thing's for sure. 626 00:29:27,930 --> 00:29:30,599 If we don't find out before this storm lets up, 627 00:29:30,666 --> 00:29:33,335 we're all gonna be dead by morning. 628 00:29:41,170 --> 00:29:44,272 (Thunder crashes) 629 00:29:47,910 --> 00:29:49,744 All right, if we're going to make it out alive, 630 00:29:49,812 --> 00:29:51,246 we got to stick together from now on. 631 00:29:51,314 --> 00:29:52,981 Is everyone here? 632 00:29:53,049 --> 00:29:54,149 Wait a minute, wait. Where's Meg? 633 00:29:54,217 --> 00:29:55,350 And where's Tom Tucker? 634 00:29:55,418 --> 00:29:56,518 Right here! 635 00:29:56,586 --> 00:29:58,186 Oh, my God! What happened? 636 00:29:58,254 --> 00:29:59,554 I fell through a trapdoor 637 00:29:59,622 --> 00:30:01,022 that led to an underground passageway. 638 00:30:01,090 --> 00:30:02,657 So I followed it, and it led me 639 00:30:02,725 --> 00:30:03,925 to a hatch over there in the parlor. 640 00:30:03,993 --> 00:30:05,360 The same thing happened to me. 641 00:30:05,428 --> 00:30:06,494 But with a moustache. 642 00:30:06,562 --> 00:30:07,896 Hey, Peter, look at this. 643 00:30:07,964 --> 00:30:10,298 I'm getting a faint signal on my cell phone. 644 00:30:10,366 --> 00:30:11,521 Really? 645 00:30:11,641 --> 00:30:13,071 Oh, my God, is that... 646 00:30:13,191 --> 00:30:15,203 Are you holding up the whole Hollywood sign? 647 00:30:15,271 --> 00:30:16,304 (Chuckling): No, no, no, no. 648 00:30:16,372 --> 00:30:18,173 The sign was way in the background. 649 00:30:18,241 --> 00:30:20,275 I was standing in the foreground going like this 650 00:30:20,343 --> 00:30:21,837 when Jillian took the picture, 651 00:30:21,860 --> 00:30:23,144 so by forced perspective, 652 00:30:23,212 --> 00:30:25,013 it looks like I'm holding up the whole sign. 653 00:30:25,081 --> 00:30:27,415 I don't believe you. I think you are a God. 654 00:30:27,483 --> 00:30:29,684 And I will die for you or kill others. 655 00:30:29,752 --> 00:30:31,086 Damn it. The signal's gone. 656 00:30:31,153 --> 00:30:33,154 If I can get up to the roof or something, 657 00:30:33,222 --> 00:30:35,657 maybe I can get a stronger signal and call the police. 658 00:30:35,725 --> 00:30:38,326 Okay. And I will skin this dog in your honor. 659 00:30:38,394 --> 00:30:39,694 - Please don't. - As you wish. 660 00:30:39,762 --> 00:30:41,730 Do you really think it could work, Derek? 661 00:30:41,797 --> 00:30:43,465 There's only one way to find out. 662 00:30:43,532 --> 00:30:44,866 I'll be back. 663 00:30:46,802 --> 00:30:48,937 All right, nobody leaves this room until he gets back. 664 00:30:49,005 --> 00:30:50,805 Wait a minute. 665 00:30:50,873 --> 00:30:52,841 Something's not right here. 666 00:30:52,909 --> 00:30:55,377 We're short one vagina in this room. 667 00:30:55,444 --> 00:30:56,945 Oh, my God! 668 00:30:57,013 --> 00:30:58,280 Priscilla's gone! 669 00:30:58,347 --> 00:31:01,016 (Thunder crashes) 670 00:31:01,083 --> 00:31:02,183 (All gasp) 671 00:31:02,251 --> 00:31:04,085 Th... That's impossible. 672 00:31:04,153 --> 00:31:06,087 She was still passed out on the couch when we left. 673 00:31:06,155 --> 00:31:07,255 (Groans) 674 00:31:07,323 --> 00:31:08,823 What the hell happened? 675 00:31:08,891 --> 00:31:10,492 Joe! You're okay! 676 00:31:10,559 --> 00:31:12,260 Yeah, I'm fine. What's going on? 677 00:31:12,328 --> 00:31:14,462 What's going on is, Priscilla's the murderer! 678 00:31:14,530 --> 00:31:15,730 Wait a second. We don't know that. 679 00:31:15,798 --> 00:31:17,732 Well, she was by herself this whole time! 680 00:31:17,800 --> 00:31:19,100 Yes, but she was unconscious! 681 00:31:19,168 --> 00:31:21,069 She could've come to and killed Muriel! 682 00:31:21,137 --> 00:31:23,171 This is all speculation! We don't know she's the killer! 683 00:31:23,239 --> 00:31:24,306 Yeah, besides, she's hot! 684 00:31:24,373 --> 00:31:25,640 Hot chicks are never crazy! 685 00:31:25,708 --> 00:31:27,175 Derek lifted up the Hollywood sign. 686 00:31:27,243 --> 00:31:29,978 (Shouting at each other, arguing frantically) 687 00:31:31,547 --> 00:31:33,882 Peter: He did, too! I saw the picture! 688 00:32:12,855 --> 00:32:14,689 (Thunder crashes) 689 00:32:17,460 --> 00:32:19,294 (Waves crashing) 690 00:32:23,240 --> 00:32:24,849 Come on. 691 00:32:34,843 --> 00:32:35,777 Yes! 692 00:32:35,845 --> 00:32:37,712 (Keys beeping) 693 00:32:39,422 --> 00:32:40,248 Hey. 694 00:32:40,316 --> 00:32:41,883 What are you doing up here? 695 00:32:41,951 --> 00:32:43,151 Wait a minute. 696 00:32:43,219 --> 00:32:44,819 What the hell is this? 697 00:32:44,887 --> 00:32:47,222 Oh, my God! It's you! 698 00:32:47,289 --> 00:32:49,958 The man or woman who's been killing everybody! 699 00:32:50,026 --> 00:32:51,693 Stay back. Stay back. 700 00:32:51,761 --> 00:32:52,827 (Bone crunches) 701 00:32:53,963 --> 00:32:55,363 (Thuds) 702 00:33:02,038 --> 00:33:03,471 It came from over there! 703 00:33:05,541 --> 00:33:06,641 (All gasp) 704 00:33:06,709 --> 00:33:08,209 Dear God! 705 00:33:10,746 --> 00:33:12,213 He's dead. 706 00:33:12,281 --> 00:33:14,282 Do you think he slipped off the roof? 707 00:33:14,350 --> 00:33:16,684 Maybe. But he was dead before the fall. 708 00:33:16,752 --> 00:33:19,954 Look at this... He's been hit on the head by a blunt object. 709 00:33:20,022 --> 00:33:22,924 Oh, my God, no, Derek! 710 00:33:22,992 --> 00:33:25,160 (Squeaky sobbing) Oh, Jillian, I'm so sorry. 711 00:33:25,227 --> 00:33:26,628 Peter: Hey, can you grab his phone? 712 00:33:26,695 --> 00:33:28,730 I want to prove something to these guys. 713 00:33:32,620 --> 00:33:34,535 (Thunder crashing) 714 00:33:34,565 --> 00:33:37,167 (Wind whistling) 715 00:33:37,235 --> 00:33:38,568 I... I... It's Priscilla. 716 00:33:38,636 --> 00:33:40,070 I... I mean, it's got to be Priscilla. 717 00:33:40,138 --> 00:33:41,505 She's the only one who's not here. 718 00:33:41,572 --> 00:33:42,606 Look, maybe, maybe not. 719 00:33:42,674 --> 00:33:44,872 We thought Muriel was the killer, and look how that turned out. 720 00:33:44,884 --> 00:33:46,070 We have no proof of anything. 721 00:33:46,093 --> 00:33:47,887 Is this the latest you've ever stayed up? 722 00:33:47,900 --> 00:33:49,913 It's the latest I've ever stayed up. 723 00:33:50,338 --> 00:33:54,217 Oh, no! Someone take Mr. Woods' Golden Globe! 724 00:33:57,288 --> 00:34:00,323 She's right! There was a Golden Globe award here, and it's gone. 725 00:34:00,391 --> 00:34:02,822 I think we may have identified our blunt object. 726 00:34:02,834 --> 00:34:04,677 So all we have to do is find that Golden Globe 727 00:34:04,689 --> 00:34:07,448 and we'll have our murder weapon... And if we're lucky, 728 00:34:07,472 --> 00:34:09,268 it may just mean we'll have our killer. 729 00:34:09,292 --> 00:34:11,777 All right, from this moment forward, 730 00:34:11,789 --> 00:34:13,468 nobody leaves the group. 731 00:34:13,491 --> 00:34:14,971 Joe's right. Everyone huddle up. 732 00:34:17,193 --> 00:34:19,060 Good. Now, we're gonna search the house, 733 00:34:19,128 --> 00:34:20,695 and we're gonna move as one. 734 00:34:20,763 --> 00:34:22,097 Anyone who separates from the group 735 00:34:22,165 --> 00:34:23,932 we will assume to be the killer. 736 00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:25,033 All clear? 737 00:34:25,101 --> 00:34:26,735 Others: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. 738 00:34:26,803 --> 00:34:27,769 All right. 739 00:34:27,837 --> 00:34:28,870 Let's do this! 740 00:34:39,515 --> 00:34:40,982 Oh, boy, we got a problem here. 741 00:34:41,050 --> 00:34:42,451 All right, on the count of three. 742 00:34:42,518 --> 00:34:44,119 One, two... 743 00:34:44,187 --> 00:34:45,420 three! 744 00:34:45,488 --> 00:34:46,521 Thanks, guys. 745 00:34:46,589 --> 00:34:49,257 (Peter humming "Hava Nagila") 746 00:34:49,325 --> 00:34:52,394 Stop it, Peter. (Continues humming) 747 00:34:52,462 --> 00:34:53,728 Peter, knock it off! 748 00:34:53,796 --> 00:34:55,096 Okay, Jew. Joe. 749 00:34:55,164 --> 00:34:56,631 Shut up! I'm not Jewish! 750 00:34:56,699 --> 00:34:59,534 Well! I think we've learned a little something 751 00:34:59,602 --> 00:35:02,637 about our friendly neighborhood policeman today. 752 00:35:03,955 --> 00:35:06,074 All right, we got to search every one of these rooms. 753 00:35:06,142 --> 00:35:07,409 We'll start with Quagmire's. 754 00:35:11,481 --> 00:35:13,448 Oh, my God! 755 00:35:13,516 --> 00:35:15,417 Are those Stephanie's underpants? 756 00:35:15,485 --> 00:35:16,451 Oh, God. 757 00:35:16,519 --> 00:35:17,819 They're huge! 758 00:35:17,887 --> 00:35:20,589 Looks like the crotch got chewed on by a walrus mouth. 759 00:35:20,656 --> 00:35:22,791 (Laughs) Look, it's got flowers! 760 00:35:22,859 --> 00:35:24,125 I mean, why bother? 761 00:35:24,193 --> 00:35:25,427 Who's gonna see 'em? 762 00:35:25,495 --> 00:35:28,129 Maybe someone in space. 763 00:35:28,197 --> 00:35:29,731 (Raucous laughter) 764 00:35:29,799 --> 00:35:32,267 Come on, guys, can't we all just be glad she's dead? 765 00:35:42,745 --> 00:35:44,579 Whose room is this? 766 00:35:44,647 --> 00:35:46,081 It's, uh, my room. 767 00:35:46,148 --> 00:35:48,650 You travel with a giant poster of yourself? 768 00:35:48,718 --> 00:35:51,920 Yes. It helps me get to sleep, knowing that Big Tom Tucker 769 00:35:51,988 --> 00:35:54,665 is keeping a watchful eye out for nocturnal intruders. 770 00:35:54,689 --> 00:35:56,814 What a ridiculous man you are. 771 00:35:56,837 --> 00:35:58,916 Look, I didn't know my room was gonna be scrutinized. 772 00:35:58,939 --> 00:36:00,695 I... If you don't like it, let's get out of here. 773 00:36:00,763 --> 00:36:02,964 Not till we've searched the place. 774 00:36:13,543 --> 00:36:15,610 (Gasps) 775 00:36:15,678 --> 00:36:18,013 You guys? 776 00:36:19,215 --> 00:36:20,649 (Thunder crashing) 777 00:36:20,716 --> 00:36:21,716 (All gasp) 778 00:36:21,727 --> 00:36:23,385 Oh, my God! 779 00:36:25,179 --> 00:36:29,124 Well, well, I think we've found our killer. 780 00:36:29,191 --> 00:36:31,026 Oh, now, now, wait a minute, that's not mine! 781 00:36:31,093 --> 00:36:33,495 I suppose it crawled under your bed all by itself. 782 00:36:33,563 --> 00:36:34,563 Well, maybe it did. 783 00:36:34,630 --> 00:36:35,764 I didn't murder anybody. 784 00:36:35,831 --> 00:36:37,566 Tell it to Mike Judge. 785 00:36:37,633 --> 00:36:39,501 Whoa, whoa, whoa, uh, this is crazy, 786 00:36:39,569 --> 00:36:40,702 Wh... What about Priscilla? 787 00:36:40,770 --> 00:36:42,404 We have no idea where she is. 788 00:36:42,471 --> 00:36:43,738 She could've planted that there. 789 00:36:43,806 --> 00:36:45,073 Well, uh... 790 00:36:45,141 --> 00:36:47,842 I suppose it's possible. 791 00:36:47,910 --> 00:36:50,045 What the hell? 792 00:36:50,112 --> 00:36:52,380 Aw, dang it, I got a nosebleed. 793 00:36:52,448 --> 00:36:54,783 No, you don't. 794 00:36:59,388 --> 00:37:01,022 Peter, give me a boost. 795 00:37:01,090 --> 00:37:02,724 (Grunting) 796 00:37:08,264 --> 00:37:09,864 (All scream) 797 00:37:09,932 --> 00:37:12,434 You're going to jail, Tucker. 798 00:37:12,501 --> 00:37:14,536 Like hell I am! You're not taking me anywhere, 799 00:37:14,604 --> 00:37:15,837 you podunk, Quahog redneck cop! 800 00:37:15,905 --> 00:37:18,173 Not you or anyone else in this damn town! 801 00:37:18,240 --> 00:37:19,975 I'm not going to jail! 802 00:37:21,477 --> 00:37:23,211 After him! 803 00:37:39,528 --> 00:37:40,729 Give it up, Tucker! 804 00:37:40,796 --> 00:37:41,963 Make me, Swanson! 805 00:37:52,375 --> 00:37:53,842 (All panting) 806 00:37:53,909 --> 00:37:55,844 Damn, he's slippery. 807 00:37:55,911 --> 00:37:57,612 (Panting) You guys give up? 808 00:37:57,680 --> 00:37:59,814 - What do we do? - Wait a minute, wait a minute, guys! 809 00:37:59,882 --> 00:38:02,064 - I got an idea. - Shoot. 810 00:38:02,088 --> 00:38:04,019 What if half of us go around one side of the table, 811 00:38:04,086 --> 00:38:05,654 and the other half go around the other side, 812 00:38:05,721 --> 00:38:07,789 and then we won't have to chase him around in circles. 813 00:38:07,857 --> 00:38:09,224 Damn, that's awfully risky. 814 00:38:09,291 --> 00:38:12,961 It sure is, but at this point I'm willing to try anything. 815 00:38:14,263 --> 00:38:16,364 All right. Let's do it! 816 00:38:17,700 --> 00:38:19,567 (Thumping) Peter: It worked! 817 00:38:19,635 --> 00:38:21,569 (Grunting) Let me go! 818 00:38:21,637 --> 00:38:23,371 Let me go, you bastards! 819 00:38:23,439 --> 00:38:25,040 You're all gonna pay for this! 820 00:38:25,107 --> 00:38:26,541 (Grunting, punch lands) 821 00:38:26,609 --> 00:38:29,377 Just for that, when the movie of this story comes out, 822 00:38:29,445 --> 00:38:32,123 I'm gonna make sure Adrian Brody plays you. 823 00:38:32,146 --> 00:38:34,107 I guess that means you don't want anyone to see it. 824 00:38:34,131 --> 00:38:35,984 (Laughter) 825 00:38:36,052 --> 00:38:38,019 (Laughter dies down) Okay. All right. 826 00:38:58,240 --> 00:39:00,375 (birds chirping) 827 00:39:06,716 --> 00:39:10,018 Thanks a lot for your help, boys. 828 00:39:16,705 --> 00:39:19,042 You know, despite all the craziness this weekend, 829 00:39:19,053 --> 00:39:20,991 I feel like a lot of people were looking at me 830 00:39:21,003 --> 00:39:22,282 like I was really attractive. 831 00:39:22,298 --> 00:39:25,133 Which makes me think that I'm gonna grow up to be good-looking. 832 00:39:25,201 --> 00:39:26,434 What part of that statement 833 00:39:26,502 --> 00:39:28,369 is supposed to lure me into a conversation? 834 00:39:28,437 --> 00:39:30,764 I talk to you about wet tennis balls. 835 00:39:32,243 --> 00:39:35,009 - Oh, come on! - We're in a fight! 836 00:39:36,579 --> 00:39:39,614 Lois, are any of my Hot Wheels in the bath... L... Lois? 837 00:39:39,682 --> 00:39:41,116 Lois? Lois? 838 00:39:41,183 --> 00:39:43,818 Lois, are any of my Hot Wheels in the bathroom? 839 00:39:43,886 --> 00:39:45,453 No, I put 'em all in your bag. 840 00:39:45,521 --> 00:39:47,288 Okay, well, I don't see the fire engine, 841 00:39:47,356 --> 00:39:51,526 but I guess we'll just find out when we get home, won't we? 842 00:39:51,594 --> 00:39:53,828 I'll see you in the car. 843 00:39:58,701 --> 00:40:00,435 Hi, Diane. 844 00:40:00,503 --> 00:40:01,903 Oh, hi, Lois. 845 00:40:01,971 --> 00:40:03,304 How you doing? 846 00:40:03,372 --> 00:40:05,840 I just thought I'd make sure you were okay. 847 00:40:05,908 --> 00:40:07,776 Oh, I'm managing. 848 00:40:07,843 --> 00:40:09,811 It's just... so hard to believe 849 00:40:09,879 --> 00:40:12,013 you can work with someone for fifteen years 850 00:40:12,081 --> 00:40:14,415 and yet have no idea who they really are 851 00:40:14,483 --> 00:40:15,850 or what they're capable of. 852 00:40:15,918 --> 00:40:16,951 Oh, I know. 853 00:40:17,019 --> 00:40:18,419 And I'm sorry. 854 00:40:18,487 --> 00:40:20,355 So, what happens now? 855 00:40:20,422 --> 00:40:22,557 Will you just anchor the news by yourself? 856 00:40:22,625 --> 00:40:24,559 I suppose, for the time being. 857 00:40:24,627 --> 00:40:26,895 Well, that's kind of exciting, right? 858 00:40:26,962 --> 00:40:28,696 (Chuckles) You sound like my mother. 859 00:40:28,764 --> 00:40:32,634 She actually bought me this blouse for my first solo broadcast. 860 00:40:32,701 --> 00:40:34,369 I guess that's sweet, huh? 861 00:40:34,436 --> 00:40:36,070 She... uh... 862 00:40:36,138 --> 00:40:38,039 I'm sorry, I don't understand. 863 00:40:38,107 --> 00:40:39,174 What do you mean? 864 00:40:39,241 --> 00:40:40,809 I mean, how could she have known 865 00:40:40,876 --> 00:40:42,210 you'd be anchoring alone? 866 00:40:42,278 --> 00:40:44,746 I mean, none of this happened until... 867 00:40:51,387 --> 00:40:52,687 (Soft gasp) 868 00:40:52,755 --> 00:40:56,157 Gosh, I, uh, you know, I think I'd better, uh... 869 00:40:56,225 --> 00:40:59,027 go make sure Peter has his, uh... 870 00:40:59,094 --> 00:41:00,395 fire engine. 871 00:41:00,462 --> 00:41:01,462 Oh, really? 872 00:41:01,530 --> 00:41:03,364 But I was enjoying our talk. 873 00:41:03,432 --> 00:41:05,967 Oh, no, I... So was I, but, you know, 874 00:41:06,035 --> 00:41:07,902 I've, really, I should... I should go. 875 00:41:07,970 --> 00:41:10,238 No. I don't think so. 876 00:41:10,306 --> 00:41:11,940 Oh, my God. 877 00:41:12,007 --> 00:41:13,975 Oh, my God, it was you. 878 00:41:14,043 --> 00:41:15,610 You're the killer! 879 00:41:15,678 --> 00:41:17,011 Very clever, Lois. 880 00:41:17,079 --> 00:41:19,180 You shouldn't have stopped to say hi to me. 881 00:41:19,248 --> 00:41:20,548 You would've lived longer. 882 00:41:20,616 --> 00:41:23,251 God, why do I ever try to be friends with other women? 883 00:41:23,319 --> 00:41:24,452 But, Diane, why? 884 00:41:24,520 --> 00:41:26,988 How could you do all these horrible things? 885 00:41:27,056 --> 00:41:29,624 Well, I suppose it all really began a year ago 886 00:41:29,692 --> 00:41:31,426 when James Woods and I met 887 00:41:31,493 --> 00:41:33,628 at a press event and began seeing each other. 888 00:41:42,537 --> 00:41:43,938 We both valued our privacy, however, 889 00:41:44,006 --> 00:41:47,242 so we agreed to keep it a secret from the media. 890 00:41:52,612 --> 00:41:56,299 Everything in my life was wonderful. 891 00:41:56,323 --> 00:41:59,053 But then a few months ago, I turned fourty. 892 00:41:59,121 --> 00:42:01,356 Others: Surprise! 893 00:42:01,423 --> 00:42:03,157 It was hard for me to begin with, 894 00:42:03,225 --> 00:42:06,527 but it got worse when, not so coincidentally, 895 00:42:06,595 --> 00:42:08,763 Tom began pushing Channel Five News to replace me 896 00:42:08,831 --> 00:42:10,865 with a fresh, young face, 897 00:42:10,933 --> 00:42:12,533 and he succeeded. 898 00:42:13,171 --> 00:42:16,237 Three weeks from now, I'll be off the air. 899 00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:20,174 Well, apparently, all men think the same way, 900 00:42:20,242 --> 00:42:22,268 because around the same time, 901 00:42:22,291 --> 00:42:23,865 James dumped me. 902 00:42:25,881 --> 00:42:28,683 I watched my career and my love life crumble, 903 00:42:28,751 --> 00:42:31,589 and I wasn't gonna just stand by and take it. 904 00:42:31,709 --> 00:42:32,987 That's when I had the good fortune 905 00:42:33,055 --> 00:42:36,057 to meet a young news intern named Priscilla. 906 00:42:36,125 --> 00:42:38,726 She was so anxious to get into the reporting business 907 00:42:38,794 --> 00:42:41,448 and would have done anything to get on my good side. 908 00:42:41,472 --> 00:42:43,151 So I seized the moment. 909 00:42:43,174 --> 00:42:46,438 I paid her off to seduce James Woods and reel him 910 00:42:46,450 --> 00:42:49,537 into a relationship like a fish on a line. 911 00:42:49,605 --> 00:42:51,973 I knew a hot, young woman like Priscilla 912 00:42:52,041 --> 00:42:55,009 could manipulate him into doing anything I wanted. 913 00:42:55,077 --> 00:42:56,678 At my direction, she persuaded him 914 00:42:56,745 --> 00:42:58,638 to become a born-again Christian, 915 00:42:58,662 --> 00:43:01,104 and instilled him with the drive to bring together 916 00:43:01,116 --> 00:43:03,351 all the people he'd wronged. 917 00:43:03,419 --> 00:43:06,354 That's how this weekend came to pass. 918 00:43:06,422 --> 00:43:09,662 Of course, Priscilla knew nothing of my real intentions, 919 00:43:09,685 --> 00:43:12,827 but she played the part beautifully, nonetheless. 920 00:43:12,895 --> 00:43:14,896 There's no way she could have known 921 00:43:14,964 --> 00:43:18,099 I planned to kill James Woods and frame Tom Tucker, 922 00:43:18,167 --> 00:43:20,034 thereby destroying the two people 923 00:43:20,102 --> 00:43:22,804 who cast me aside and ruined my life. 924 00:43:22,871 --> 00:43:24,839 Oh, my God... 925 00:43:24,907 --> 00:43:26,374 you're fourty? 926 00:43:26,442 --> 00:43:28,509 Yes. I'm fourty. 927 00:43:28,577 --> 00:43:30,845 But then why did you kill the others? 928 00:43:30,913 --> 00:43:33,147 It was all supposed to go so smoothly. 929 00:43:33,215 --> 00:43:34,882 The hidden gun goes off, 930 00:43:34,950 --> 00:43:37,118 kills James Woods, and at the first opportunity, 931 00:43:37,186 --> 00:43:40,488 I retrieve the gun and plant it in Tom's bag. 932 00:43:40,556 --> 00:43:41,923 James Woods is dead, 933 00:43:41,991 --> 00:43:44,392 Tom goes to prison... Nice and easy. 934 00:43:44,964 --> 00:43:46,925 But Stephanie got in the way. 935 00:43:46,936 --> 00:43:49,285 She was in James' chair at the wrong time. 936 00:43:49,308 --> 00:43:52,233 And when I realized my mistake, I had to improvise. 937 00:43:52,301 --> 00:43:55,236 The power outage provided a perfect cover. 938 00:43:55,304 --> 00:43:59,073 I grabbed the knife off the dinner table and stabbed him. 939 00:43:59,141 --> 00:44:01,509 But as Joe pointed out, there were fingerprints. 940 00:44:01,577 --> 00:44:03,277 I couldn't just leave it there. 941 00:44:03,345 --> 00:44:05,847 So when Tom and I got separated in the gallery, 942 00:44:05,914 --> 00:44:08,449 I went back into the dining room and got the knife. 943 00:44:08,517 --> 00:44:09,718 But at that moment, 944 00:44:09,730 --> 00:44:11,953 Priscilla regained consciousness after fainting. 945 00:44:12,021 --> 00:44:14,295 She started to become hysterical. 946 00:44:14,318 --> 00:44:16,224 I knew I couldn't risk her revealing 947 00:44:16,291 --> 00:44:18,526 that I had engineered this whole gathering... 948 00:44:18,594 --> 00:44:19,861 so I killed her. 949 00:44:19,928 --> 00:44:21,737 And I hid her in Tom's room. 950 00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:23,031 I tried to plant the knife 951 00:44:23,098 --> 00:44:24,899 in Tom's suitcase, but at that moment, 952 00:44:24,919 --> 00:44:27,652 Muriel walked in, caught me in the act. 953 00:44:27,675 --> 00:44:29,580 It wasn't her fault, poor thing, 954 00:44:29,604 --> 00:44:30,978 but she had to die. 955 00:44:31,001 --> 00:44:33,584 I stabbed her, and she screamed. 956 00:44:33,608 --> 00:44:34,675 I had to leave the knife 957 00:44:34,743 --> 00:44:36,310 in her, because I couldn't very well 958 00:44:36,378 --> 00:44:38,859 hide it on my person with everyone quickly closing in. 959 00:44:38,979 --> 00:44:42,170 So I wiped off the fingerprints and ran. 960 00:44:42,290 --> 00:44:44,052 I slipped in with the rest of the group, 961 00:44:44,119 --> 00:44:46,087 when they all converged on the scene. 962 00:44:46,155 --> 00:44:49,436 I needed more time to finish my work framing Tom. 963 00:44:49,556 --> 00:44:51,972 But that's when Derek went out to the balcony. 964 00:44:52,217 --> 00:44:54,095 I couldn't let him contact the police 965 00:44:54,107 --> 00:44:55,516 before everything was in the place. 966 00:44:55,539 --> 00:44:57,331 So I had to kill him, too. 967 00:44:57,399 --> 00:44:59,033 When Peter was yelling at everyone 968 00:44:59,101 --> 00:45:01,702 about that picture of Derek holding up the Hollywood sign, 969 00:45:01,770 --> 00:45:04,806 I grabbed the Golden Globe and slipped out. 970 00:45:05,164 --> 00:45:07,475 I followed Derek outside and did what I had to do. 971 00:45:10,882 --> 00:45:12,916 I barely had enough time to plant the Golden Globe 972 00:45:12,928 --> 00:45:14,889 in Tom's room and run back downstairs, 973 00:45:14,912 --> 00:45:16,967 where I took advantage of the commotion 974 00:45:16,991 --> 00:45:18,259 and joined the crowd 975 00:45:18,270 --> 00:45:20,583 as they were all running outside. 976 00:45:21,323 --> 00:45:22,890 And the rest... 977 00:45:22,958 --> 00:45:24,961 Well, you did all the rest for me. 978 00:45:24,973 --> 00:45:28,366 You turned on Tom exactly as I planned. 979 00:45:29,130 --> 00:45:30,680 So there it is, Lois. 980 00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:33,111 My God. 981 00:45:33,231 --> 00:45:35,870 But wait, there's one thing unaccounted for... 982 00:45:35,938 --> 00:45:37,905 What happened to Stephanie's body? 983 00:45:37,973 --> 00:45:40,007 Actually, that's the one thing I don't know. 984 00:45:42,583 --> 00:45:43,778 Damn it! 985 00:45:45,598 --> 00:45:48,330 Well, now you know everything, Lois. 986 00:45:48,345 --> 00:45:50,651 Which, of course, means I have to kill you. 987 00:45:55,591 --> 00:45:56,757 Lois, are you coming? 988 00:45:56,825 --> 00:45:58,559 I can't play my tapes without the key. 989 00:45:58,627 --> 00:46:00,895 Well, actually, Lois and I were just about to go 990 00:46:00,963 --> 00:46:03,164 for a quick walk, weren't we, Lois? 991 00:46:03,232 --> 00:46:04,765 We've been getting better acquainted. 992 00:46:04,833 --> 00:46:06,434 All right, well, just give me the key, please. 993 00:46:06,502 --> 00:46:08,736 All right, Peter, I'll get it. 994 00:46:08,804 --> 00:46:11,072 Don't put a gun in my back. 995 00:46:11,140 --> 00:46:13,341 I'm not, I'm just asking for the key. Give me the key. 996 00:46:13,408 --> 00:46:15,343 Lois: Peter, we've been married twenty years. 997 00:46:15,410 --> 00:46:17,378 Please recognize when I'm acting out of the ordinary 998 00:46:17,446 --> 00:46:18,846 because I'm in danger. 999 00:46:18,914 --> 00:46:22,416 Here you go. Here's the key, Pete. 1000 00:46:22,484 --> 00:46:24,018 Peter: Why is she calling me Pete? 1001 00:46:24,086 --> 00:46:25,820 We been married fourteen years. She never called me Pete. 1002 00:46:25,888 --> 00:46:27,455 Why am I trying to figure this out 1003 00:46:27,523 --> 00:46:29,557 when I could be listening to my tapes in the car? 1004 00:46:30,041 --> 00:46:30,875 Bye. 1005 00:46:32,448 --> 00:46:33,916 Shall we? 1006 00:47:08,096 --> 00:47:11,265 Well, it's a shame that you have to die, Lois, 1007 00:47:11,333 --> 00:47:13,000 but look on the bright side: 1008 00:47:13,068 --> 00:47:15,836 You'll be a story on the 6:00 news. 1009 00:47:15,904 --> 00:47:18,139 You know, unless a local cat does something funny. 1010 00:47:18,207 --> 00:47:20,641 Diane, please, please, don't do this! 1011 00:47:20,709 --> 00:47:23,110 I won't tell anybody, I swear to God! 1012 00:47:23,178 --> 00:47:26,047 That's right. You won't. 1013 00:47:26,114 --> 00:47:27,548 Good-bye, Lois. 1014 00:47:31,853 --> 00:47:33,621 (Gunshot) 1015 00:47:38,927 --> 00:47:40,828 (Gasps) 1016 00:47:44,366 --> 00:47:47,468 (Screaming) 1017 00:47:56,211 --> 00:47:57,812 Lois: Hello? 1018 00:48:00,616 --> 00:48:02,650 Is anyone there? 1019 00:48:07,756 --> 00:48:11,626 Whoever you are... Thank you! 1020 00:48:19,635 --> 00:48:23,070 If anybody's gonna take that bitch down, it's gonna be me. 1021 00:48:34,036 --> 00:48:38,744 -- Sync, corrected by elderman -- -- for